How Facebook touched my Heart this morning?

I´ve always loved Facebook. In spite of the all fear and criticism floating around the web against it, I am here because I want to be here, because I enjoy the medium. Both sets of my family are really far away and they feel closer to me when they can see my pictures, what I am up to, even though I cannot update them every single day personally ( as much as I would want to). I have around 350 people on my Facebook, the ones I know I can trust with the sharing of my personal life and who are, for the most part, happy to see me shine.

There was a time when I had over 1200 "friends" here. It didn´t feel good to be so intimate with strangers, with people who couldn´t be bothered whether it was your birthday or you got married. They probably wouldn´t even care if you died. So I did some Facebook cleansing. And it felt really liberating! To be surrounded by joy, positivity, with the warmth of people who care or at least believe in your basic goodness and appreciate you for it.
Being busy is the truth of our modern lives. Our work and professional lives consume so much of us and our time, that maintaining contact to our dear ones often suffers. I´ve noticed time and again how many people tell us they feel close to me and my husband, just by watching our lives via Facebook.
But what touched me about Facebook this morning?  I sat with my coffee and just happened to casually roll down my own news feed. And all the joy of my own experiences just washed me over, like wave after wave, on a wild ecstatic sea. 

Seeing the constant love of my close friends and family, seeing myself looking gorgeous in my many, pretty dresses, seeing our travels over the last years, the repeated confessions of the love of my husband from Valentine´s day to our anniversary, all the crazy, exciting food we cooked and ate, our accomplishments, the move to Paris, the little nothings of enjoying cider on an evening or just dancing in our own living room - it all felt so good!
I literally had to stop sipping my coffee and go - O my gosh! What a life I have... How rich and blessed we are to be experiencing this gift. A simple fact we forget when we get "busy" in the daily muck. We forget the greatness of our own life, of our own being. And that love and happiness of the moments is all that matters.
And what a wonder this digital archiving! I could scroll down my own page in no time and gather so much strength from my own happy memories...I could touch them, feel them and they made me smile as if they were all waiting to remind me..." Don´t forget us and don´t forget to draw your joy from us, from time to time, especially on days when you feel bla or complainy or blue, " ( we ALL do on some days!)
My husband and I have albums of our three weddings. But its hard to reach out to them each time and turn every single page with leisure, though we often do it with our friends. Most of our pictures are digitally stored on the cameras or computers and you have go to dig them out and one almost never ends up doing that. Our joyful moments then become just experiences we first talk about, then remember occasionally and then they fade away... and we are again left with a sulky feeling of boredom in our mouth... Where is the excitement? Where are we are travelling to next? What are we doing next to be happy?
If we could just look back... we would ALL swell with pride at how far we have come from where we were... and there is so much love, so much joy, so much warmth and closeness, so many blessings to count....
Facebook reminded me this morning that I am a darn lucky and loved girl! That´s how Facebook touched my heart this morning. I hope you allow it to touch yours too 

Inspirational People I Met Recently

A fully pregnant and fully smiling Afro-French woman walking through a busy street of Paris with a three-year old daughter on her one hand and a bag full of groceries on the other ...

The German guy in Berlin who found my Iphone 6 lying at a train station and called my husband to inform him that he had found it and I could pick it up from him ...

My father-in-law who realized the need to slow-down in life and connect with his loved ones after going through terrible pain as a result of a major surgery...

The Editor of the Women´s Magazine I write for, who truly gives expression to all voices that reach her ...without judgement, without question... her radical love for authenticity feels inspiring ... 

My mom who sends the entire family a Whats App balloon each morning, come rain, summer or snow.. She says daily contact makes her feel connected even though we are all so far away in physical distance from each other...

My mother-in-law who has embraced me with open arms and not just in words but with true action... she never lets me miss my mother when she is around... her openness, her acceptance feels inspiring...

The gentlemen I met briefly at a cocktail party at ESA who actually reached out to me later himself and connected me with his best friend in Paris so that I would know more people in the city... He is a senior officer in the European Commission ...

My closest guy friend who supports me like a rock with all my dreams and expects nothing in return... his genorosity of the heart feels inspiring ...

The Indian teenager who wrote to me about how being brown felt like a curse through her life until she read my article on being brown and saw a new way of being beautiful... She feels beautiful and stronger she said...and it will stay this way now ...

My sister who lives in New York but engages with every detail of my life as if she were my best friend living in Paris... she does it daily because she knows it is important ... Her care for our bond feels inspiring ...

My conversation with a stranger that left me feeling washed off with passion, confidence and connection... her vulnerability, her bid to go all out and hide nothing... felt inspiring ...

My husband who day after day, showers me with candlelight breakfast surprises, kisses, hugs and presents, in spite of working hard daily from 8am to 7pm at his workplace... his unconditional love for me feels inspiring... the man he is feels inspiring ...

And last but not the least, I feel inspired by me ...
I feel inspired by this journey I am on... I feel inspired by the woman I am and the woman I am going to be ..
I feel inspired by me because I know deep down, I have a uniqueness that must be expressed and lived, for it touches the lives of many I don´t know personally....

I feel soaked in inspiration. And if you observe closely, you don´t have to look far away to find it. It is close to you, in the people around you... within you...  if only you seek it.  

What am I doing right now?

I´ve been trying to write you something the whole day today. In fact today I am even out of my bed (where I generally like to write from), and writing at a desk. The inspiration has been failing me since morning.

I´ve drunk two coffees, I´ve Facebooked, I´ve exchanged emails with a dear friend and sent my mom in India many Whats App messages on what an awesome mom she is and how much I love her. I´ve listened to an inspirational interview on entrepreneurship.

Half way through the day, and when I realized I wasn´t getting anywhere, I decided to go to the gym. My Procrastination Queen returned briefly to my head (if you don´t know her, she is the very strong lazy voice in my head who constantly tells me that anything you can do tomorrow, why are you doing it today?) but a call from my husband in the afternoon provided me the encouraging drop of motivation that squashed Proc-Queen. Yay!

Going to the gym made me feel fantastic. I ran my thoughts and gremlins out on the tread mill and gave myself a pat on the back for overcoming Proc-Queen. The sauna felt relaxing and by the time I got out, I was feeling light and weightless as a feather.

Writing is produced when one feels stirred. At least the kind of writing I like to do, straight from the heart, emotionally full writing. Right now, honestly, I am feeling so relaxed, that nothing comes to my mind. I feel blank. In a very good way. A bit like how silent a metropolitan city feels at night- quiet and still but you still know the bundle of energy it will be in the morning again.

So my dear readers, as much as I love you, tonight I am calling it quits on trying to produce anything and indulging in my own peace and stillness. See you soon though :* 

My Top 5 French Food Favourites

For all those who know me closely, know I am a major Foodie. I take my food really seriously. However, most of my cravings are centred around Indian food. I´ve lived in Italy, United States, Germany, Switzerland, U.K. in the last years – but no food, anywhere, could shake my loyalty for Indian food. We have the best spices. We have the most innovative food combinations. We have the largest variety of dishes across the country that you can ever dream of.  We don´t care that you get fat when you eat that oil dripping, deep-fried Samosa or creamy Butter Chicken. We only care that you enjoy it. That you forget the world and your worries while you eat this food. That you slow-down and experience the experience of eating this food.

So not surprisingly, when I moved to Paris, France recently with my husband, I was initially quite closed to being convinced by the superiority of French food. I felt as though I knew it all already! Not the most remarkable trait I admit, but I can be strong-headed sometimes.

Needless to say, when you live in a country, you cannot “escape” its food. It stares at you from every nook and corner and we did end up visiting many French restaurants by a series of coincidences.

I have to confess that French food is different, rich and interesting. Many a times I just found myself observing how they had done a dish, what ingredients they had used and how they got the flavours they did. Like the Italians, they have many raw flavours in their foods and also relish a lot of beef (which I don´t take!). I´ve only been in Paris four months now, but I already have my personal French food favourites. I will revise the list again, of that I am sure, because I know there is so much more food here to try. But for now, here´s what I love in French food that I tried -  

1. Croque Monsieur

This is my version of French Pizza and it tastes heavenly when well-done. It consists of a crispy bread layered with melted cheese and ham. I indulge in it with the sharp, French Dijon mustard! Umm.. Delight!

Look at the dripping cheese. Image credit - lifeandstyle.ca

2. Crepes and Galette

It is said that Crepes originate from the region of Brittany in Western France. It made sense therefore to try them in their country of origin. However, I had eaten Crepes in Germany and didn´t feel particularly impressed by them. It´s just like a sweet pancake in nutella or caramel, right?
Wrong! The French take this stuff as serious business. On a trip with some friends to Café Breizh (recommended by Google for Crepes and Galette), I had the most divine Crepe one can imagine. It had salty caramel sauce (eeww I had thought to myself in the beginning), marinated apples and vanilla ice cream on it and with each bite we literally went mmm…mmm… a bit to the embarrassment of the neighbours seated at the next table. Please try this stuff. You won´t regret it.

Talking about Galette, this is again a typical French food, originating in France. I didn´t know what they were in the first place so I decided to give it a try. Delicious as hell again, these are buckwheat savoury pancakes which are offered with a wide variety of ingredients within them. I chose the one with Le Gruyere Cheese, ham, sunny-side up eggs and onions, slow-cooked for over 48 hours in cider. The onions added a remarkable flavour that I had never tasted before – they were sweet and sour, intoxicating almost.
It´s a full meal, this stuff.  

Crepe with salty caramel, caramelized apples and Vanilla Icecream

Buckwheat savoury Galette with eggs, ham, cheese and cider onions

3. Croissants

Yes we all know them and eat them but nobody, anywhere does it better than the French themselves. Well may be the Austrians do, but I haven´t tried theirs.

This was my easy, first favourite when we arrived in Paris. You can choose to pick up this multi-layered, over-buttered, soft flaky bread at a famous French Patisserie (bakery) or even at the local Carrefour market. They all do it good! It’s almost ironical that I enjoy my croissants with an extra layer of butter added to them from the top, after all the layers of butter already gone into making it. Melt in your mouth. Part of every French breakfast.

This brunch of ours at Cafe Francour, Mont Marte, has delectable croissants on the top right hand side corner and mouth watering sweet French toasts ( my next favourite) at the bottom right hand corner.

4. French Toast

The exact origin of this food is not known. However, in France it is popular as “Pain Perdu.”
This is basically bread that is dipped in milk and eggs and fried. The sweet version of it I enjoy with maple syrup or marmalade. The savoury one can be eaten with mustard or cheese. It´s really easy to make it at home. However, we once had it for brunch at Café Francouer and I felt surprised at how deliciously layeredtheir French toast was – it had an amazing yet mild filling of sugar inside. How they did it, only they know, but some secrets of their cuisine, the French can keep J

5. Desserts of all shapes and sizes

I don´t know where to start with this one. But probably the pictures will give you an idea of the sheer variety of lovely, sweet things that the French create with devotion. There is a patisserie at every little corner you turn to, full of colourful little macaroons and pastries and cakes of all shapes and sizes.

My favourite French dessert so far is Crème Brulee. It has a base of vanilla pudding generally with crisp, burnt sugar layered on the top. One bite of a well-made Crème Brulee and you look down upon the other “lesser mortals” in the world of desserts. However, make no mistake that is the best that the French have to offer. It is my personal favourite and I have much left to experiment with.

Colorful Macaroons staring at you through the window of each patisserie

I once remember entering an ordinary Café at Mont Marte to enjoy a coffee with a piece of cake while reading my book. I ordered a simple pastry but it was only when I bit into it that I realized it had four layers – of almonds, pistachio, caramel and cream, over and above the cake. That´s ordinary French sweets for you. I could risk saying that in this department, they could give close competition to us Indians and our halwas and ras malais.    

Just another patisserie at Mont Marte

Apart from my top five, I really enjoy drinking red wine in France. I´ve never had bad red wine here – only good and excellent. Their cheeses I´d like to try more and also their Quiches. As I said before, just one post cannot do justice to France´s talent in cuisine. I will be back with more food that brings joy to my life in this lovely country.

Story of my life in Paris. Until next time :)

On Gratitude, on Diwali

Whether through spiritual practices of yoga and meditation or simply being on a journey of finding peace within ourselves, time and again we hear the wise reminder - be grateful !

What does it mean to be grateful and why is it so important? Why does every blog we read on healing our hearts, letting go of the pain, enjoying the moment - include - be grateful? Today on the auspicious day of Diwali, that we celebrate with so much joy and gaiety in India and the world over, I peeped inside of me and discovered that my primary emotion was that of gratitude.

Honestly, I feel so full of gratitude this morning that I could burst into tears.  I registered that my gratitude aches for expression and I explore it here, spontaneously with you. I feel thankful for this beautiful life, for the unconditional love of my husband and for this divine bond of marriage that we share, for the ever-familiar, sometimes too-much advising, yet unshakeable love of my alive and healthy and supportive parents. I feel thankful for my elder sister - my ever the best friend. I feel thankful that God has blessed me with health, with good looks, with food and shelter and moments of laughter with my friends and people who care for me and I know will be there for me. Ah. Ain´t I blessed?

Gratitude does not mean life is perfect - it means we see it as perfect, just the way it is. We accept it, we embrace it and we rejoice in what is. And that is why gratitude feels so liberating. You no more feel the burden of the shoulds - and musts - of what can be and could be - but revel and indulge in the is, in what you do have - your current reality which is beautiful, if only you care to look close enough.

It is on a day like today that I also feel sad for people who do not experience thankfulness. Always restless, always focusing on what´s lacking, what´s missing, what could be better.

This diwali, I really truly hope, that you see the spark within yourself, amidst the light of the numerous candles. I wish for you that you forgive yourself for your failings, you quit being hard on yourself - whether you are lazy, or demotivated, or not doing enough - its OKAY! Look back and see all that you have already achieved - and be thankful. Feel the gratitude down to your toes and let it fill you up. Let it give you the peace that you deserve to feel within.  Let it remind you of the countless blessings you are showered with - that you can laugh and be happy without any regrets. Even if nothing ever changed after today, you still have so much to feel thankful for.

Happy Diwali :)

Being a Kid Remorselessly - A Trip to Disneyland Paris ! :)

I love being a kid. It feels so good and so much fun.

I have never believed anyone who has even remotely tried to convince me that when we get older, we lose our light heartedness - that adult life is about jobs and bills, responsibilities, discipline, self-growth and defining our personalities as individuals. May be it is but then light-heartedness is too big a price to pay for the adult life in exchange!

Lose my light heartedness because I´m 26? 

For as long as I can remember, anyone who knows me even passably well would have invariably experienced the kid in me. It just shows J Whether in romantic references to the Disney princesses and princes until today or speaking in baby voices or making faces which draw their inspiration from no-one-has figured-out-where, the kid in me seeks daily expression for its nourishment and I am happy to oblige it.

I also have vivid memories of the sleepless nights I spent between the ages of 6-10, putting my head to my pillow and letting my mind run wild with imagination - dreaming of Rapunzel´s hair falling down from the castle tower, and what fun it would be to possess a Genie for myself and if only I could dress in Cindrella´s ball gown and meet a handsome prince. I confess feeling jealous too of those kids in school who got to visit Disneyland and I spent hours wondering what it would feel like to be in that magnificent castle of the princesses that always sparks with fireworks at the beginning of all Disney movies.  Needless to say, it was a life´s dream come true and I had to scream, scream, scream with joy when I was told my birthday present from my husband was a trip to Disneyland in Paris.

The day started very early and I felt free and chirpy – just the way I like it. The first look of the castle brought a smile to my face. It was magnificent and looked so real. I could feel my body tingling with sensations of happiness, memories from childhood and just that great, great feeling of receiving something you have so much craved for.

Joy. Dreams do come true! :)

The rides in the park were fun too! I loved the Big Thunder Mountain that went bumping around a modelled mountain mimicking the Grand Canyon.  I also felt particularly impressed with the Pirates of the Caribbean ride – it had a most splendid display of pirate mannequins and recreation of their lives on the sea and in their villages. Our boat splashing into the water was the added adventure-adrenalin bonus!!

Woa !

However, for me, you don´t visit Disneyland for the rides. You will get better ones any day at Six Flags over Georgia (I remember my crazy xxx thrill rides in the summer of 2009 in Atlanta City). You go to Disneyland for the characters … to see your imagination come alive and dance and frolic before you. Hence, for me the most exciting and moving highlight of the day was the “Magic Everywhere” parade of the Disney characters that lasted about thirty minutes with all famous Disney characters, dancing and parading before us.

Being there in that moment felt so alive.  I excitedly pushed my way through hordes of people standing before me, waiting to catch a glimpse.  Paradoxical as it may seem, the characters felt so real, it gave me goose bumps. Cindrella, Snow White, Simba and Pumba, Alladin and Genie, Goofy and Mickey, Chipmunks and Peter Pan – were all right before me, riding their chariots with their princes or riding their own display wagon with wonderfully recreated environments of their movie stories. The music, the dancing, all felt so professional- all so well done. I stood there so present in the moment, spell bound watching them, not minding the rain falling on my head - their gorgeous outfits, their grace, their mannered gestures, their capacity for fun … I felt the same love swirling up for them in my belly, perhaps slightly more than it did when I was 6.  A lifelong dream had come true. I had to cry some tears of joy. This was too beautiful an experience.

Note- Imagine some pixie dust floating in the air and all of these characters that you see still in these pictures, dancing and telling you to celebrate the magic of life … its everywhere!

After the parade, we took a rollercoaster ride called Space Mountain. It was pretty disgusting, gave me a headache and made me feel puky. However, for his love of space policy, my husband loved it!

By 9pm in the evening, our bodies had given up from the exhaustion of the day´s frolic but our spirits could soak in more joy. Although 11 pm seemed far away with the rain and our wet clothes and me feeling cold in my skinny shorts, we braved it out to stay back for the spectacular end of the day – Disney lights and sound show - at the castle. And it was so worth the wait! For 20 minutes Disney spectacles you by presenting a show of its characters using the castle as a screen – with sounds and lights and an ultra-heavy display of fireworks. I believe you have to be there to know how it feels. For me, I cannot describe it… I felt so quiet… so amazed…so struck by what we humans can achieve through our rich imagination … I felt thankful too … even though for just a day, I was in magic land and it was all true.

The castle lit up at night

Fireworks. Celebrating us :))

The fireworks ensured the day ended with a blast. Literally.

We returned home way past midnight but with so much joy stored in us from what we had experienced.

Go to Disneyland people or if you cannot, be a kid every day at home or with your best friend. It just feels great. Always J 

Miss Petite Pirate

Sales Mania in Paris

“I guess it goes to show that you just never know where life will take you. You search for answers. You wonder what it all means. You stumble, and you soar. And, if you’re lucky, you make it to Paris for a while.” 
― Amy Thomas, Paris, My Sweet: A Year in the City of Light

Indeed, lucky me! Made it to Paris as a young woman, while I can still indulge in all of its glorious offerings. Ever since the move here, I have been swamped by curious girlfriends on what shopping in Paris is like. The French capital is rightfully the Mecca of fashion in Europe and possibly even the world, as many would argue. The birthplace of brands like Chanel, Christian Dior, Louis Vuitton, Fcuk, Lacoste, Yves Saint Laurent and countless others, Paris is any girl´s dream.

When we moved to Paris on the 1^st of July this year and before I had poured myself a glass of water in our new home, my landlady informed me in a hurried, urgent sort of way, “Sales are on in Paris in the months of July and August. Up to 75% off even on luxury brands. You must go soon or you will miss out.” I remember saying, “Yes sure. I´d love to explore.” The next thing I remember is sharing the woes of not speaking French with a girlfriend and the complicated Metro system that doesn´t allow one to transfer to buses with the same metro ticket and she responding, “Oh Sami. But there are sales in Paris. Tell me how it is?” My ever-loving sister could also not be left behind. When sharing that we bought annual passes to the Louvre, she was happy but urged that I report on the sales in Paris and enquire how much it costs to parcel stuff to her to the United States.

Sales in Paris! The seeming panacea to all problems of a woman. I have to confess I felt slightly under pressure at this point. It felt as though I was being left behind in some kind of critical life race. People would give anything to be in my place and here I am, sitting at home with the emotions of a grumpy expat. It was time to step out of the house and swing in some skirts and cat-walk in some shoes!

Since shopping and fashion in Paris is a “huge” topic, this post is the first of a series to come as I explore the city´s taste more and more. For now, my first impressions in the sales season.

Red Alert - virtually every shop window in July-August has Soldes ( Sales) stamped on it!

Like any other metropolitan of the world, Paris has all the big brands you can think of. It also has all the famous chain stores that a girl like me would go to – Zara, Mango, Prada, New Look, H&M for casuals. As I walked into a store of a famous fruity clothes brand last weekend in the mall Les Halles, it felt like I had entered a fish market in Bangladesh. Literally! Women push you from the left, the right and all clothes hanging in the sales section are XXL, XL and L (L only if you are lucky!)  I felt so overwhelmed, so quickly, that I even surprised myself, having always considered myself a passionate shopper. It was also fascinating to note how the good men who support their women in the shopping endeavors, stand clustered and flustered on one side of the shop watching with amusement and sometimes despair while their lady loves struggle against all hope to find a size 34 among all the 44s on the shelf.

Needless to say, I bought nothing from the sales section. To me they were just a set of over-sized, sometimes even dirty, spotted clothes that the brand wanted to get rid of, because nobody was buying them at their higher price and you could see why : D I picked up a white-polka dotted red top with the feel of 20s Paris and a skinny fit jeans from the new collection to make myself happy. With a red lipstick and some chic shoes, I´d be killer, I thought to myself and rejoiced! The jewelry section on sales might interest some of you though as the same stuff is sold on reduced prices. I got myself a golden bracelet and a baby pink, black polka dotted glamour handbag from the new collection of handbags (I feel so old-fashioned at heart sometimes – polka dots love!)  

My baby doll glam bag. Love it!

Next, H&M had good collection for casual days but again, to my disappointment, there was nothing “Parisian”, nothing glamorous enough to meet the “over-the-top” expectations that I had from the fashion in the city. Some other shops that I casually entered into in the mall, had prices ranging from 190 euros for a size S plain white synthetic top (you´d get it for Indian Rs.80 or one Euro in Connaught place in Delhi, I swear!). The more unheard of the brand, the more insane were the prices. So much for exaggeration on the name of a Parisian brand. I had to get out of this irritating place!

A failed trial at Mango. XS is too big for me!

Just as in life the sun rises when you give up hope on a dark night, the Parisian boutique that rescued the day for me came into sight while I was walking towards a station to take the metro home. How did I forget to try the boutiques? Boutiques are Paris´s shopping uniqueness. There are a several hundred spread all over the city, designing and selling their own clothes. At first sight itself, the dresses on display outside had caught my attention. This felt a bit different and I was willing to give it a shot.

The salesman was a charmer. Almost to the point of being flirtatious, in a flattering, non-threatening way of course. He made me smile. No matter what dress I put my hand on, he told me how magnificent “chérie” (dear me) would look in it and I should just put it on. As I said before, the dresses here had a unique personality of their own. One could see they were made with care - someone had attempted to think a bit out-of-the-box and play more courageously with fresh colors. The texture of the materials also felt of much superior quality. 

The exotic little boutique I discovered right outside Le Halles

While many good dresses that I tried simply didn´t fit me (I am a tad smaller than the usual European lady and lovably so), I finally selected a short, colorful, easy-breezy dress for the hot summer days…. matched with a colorful pair of sandals, it would feel so much fun to wear it on the streets of Paris! It´s still not something “over-the-top” but it has a feminine, almost sexy appeal to it with a soft, excellent quality cotton material. I could imagine myself wearing it to Petre Andre´s song "mysterious girl" on a sky blue beach of Copacabana... one day !

More than anything, I felt I had got a first glimpse of what is awaiting me further in this city – a huge row of singular boutiques with personalized fashion sense of the designers to play with. I bought my bluey dress and smiled a secret smile of anticipation within my heart...

The shopper´s smile of anticipation.

.